]:

After today, I finally found it not so hard to cry afterall.

Humans cannot be trusted, even if its your very own father.

After tonight, I know what is it that love hurts.

And I've learn a lesson not to trust anybody too much.

I've put all my trust in you and looked what happened.

This scar cannot be healed.

This is it.

I don't know whats instored for me in the near future.

I dont wanna know either.

All I know, is not going to be bright.

I'm very helpless.

I don't know what to do.

I need some answers please.

If there's a god above, why cant you help me.

Give me some answers that I've waiting for too long just to hear it.

My life is pretty much in a huge mess right now.

So much things that I've knew never existed.

How I wish someone... ANYONE, would be beside me.. and listen to me rant.

I don't know where to head in life, I've lost my goals, I've lost my way.

Is there no turning back?

When am I going to be a step closer in hearing what I wanna hear way too long ago.

I'm so lost.

Perhaps not even god can help me out right now.

Looks like imma face this shit alone.

So be it then, I'll learn to be stronger the next time I stand back up on my feet.

But how long is that gonna be.

I cant even find strength to do anything.

Looks like is gonna be tough.

I deserve this shit.

I blame myself.

Good night.

Life suck!

UPDATES!! 28 OCT 09 (TUESDAY)

Nothing much happened.

EXCEPT that We went to sungei buloh nature reserve.

To do some stupid sketching.

Is part of our module.

This place... is awfulllllyyyyy ulu... and freakingggg farrr..

Surrounding it are nothing but army camps, limitless cemetries and narrow one lane roads.

Surrounding the roads are just greenery.. either jungle of just a plain piece of grassland.

Saw this reallyyy cool "I dont know what izzit called" creature.

OMG.. Is just like crawling around the visitors center and is the center of attraction.

It looks like a reptile.

OK you know wad??? It is a fregging reptile.

HAHAHAHAHA..

This mangrove picture is kinda cool. Semi 3d Display.

Is like picture in de background and a real mangrove tree root like kinda link with the picture.

WOOTS~~!!~~

OH... before i forget.

Dinnered with my mom previous night.... was really cool.

Went to marina square.

And its been a long time since i solo-ed dinner with her.

HAHA.. really a very very long time..

well.. still as naggy as ever...

They are not called moms for no reason.

HHAHAHAAAA...

Taken while my mom is trying out her clothes in the changing room.

(P.S. Ignore that half hot guy beside me. I think i am hotter than him. FOCUS ON ME!! )

HAHAHA

Slight not what's near, while aiming at what's far.

Updatess!!! - 29 OCT 09!

Met drummer for lunch.

She was left out by her classmates.

All dumb gamers.. HAHAHA.( I am not a game FYI. )

She called me and joined us aftermath for lunch.

Us = me victor and kendrick.

Ate chicken cutlet.

She ate some chicken rice.

And the chicken.. is seriously mutated.

That piece of meat is the thigh or de drumstick part of the chicken.

And is like freaking same size as my arm.

Is super big.

I swear, she took a picture of it... can go her blog and see the mutated chicken.

Anyways.. met her again after school.

Headed down to town.

Went to paragon to change her bag (:

Went to marks and spencer to check out our wine gummies but is still OOS.

SADDDDDD ):

Went to taka... and ate dinner.

She watched me eat.

Waited with her for her bus at D' bus-stop.

Went to Kinokuniya to search for a book.

But apparently, the branch at ngee ann city is too big.

And i am wayyyyyy to lazyyyy to slowly search for it.

Gave up almost immediately and headed home.

Thought of alot of things on my bus ride home.

Was quite emo ):

But feeellingggg bettaaa noww..

[:

This is just to make LAO ZHENG jealous.

WAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I know you hate me.. HAHAHA(: (:

Hope is only the love of life.

Water

Water - the ace of elements.

Water dives from the clouds without parachute, wings or safety net.

Water runs over the steepest precipice and blinks not a lash.

Water is buried and rises again; water walks on fire and fire gets the blisters.

Stylishly composed in any situation - solid, gas or liquid

Speaking in penetrating dialects understood by all things - animal, vegetable or mineral

Water travels intrepidly through four dimensions, sustaining, destroying, and creating.

Always in motion, ever-flowing (whether at stream rate or glacier speed), rhythmic, dynamic, ubiquitous, changing and working its changes, a mathematics wrong side out, a philosophy in reverse, the ongoing odyssey of water is virtually irresistible.

UPDATES!!!

Monday, ended school early.

Went town with classmates.

When they left, headed down to somewhere and get something ( only few people know bout this ^shy^)

HAHAHAHAHA.

And went back home.

Met mom for dinner,

Tried to physco her to get me something but faileddddd.

Will try harder.

Tuesday, went to school as per normal.

Met drummer after school.

Pass her the *something* that i bought for her.

Is gooooooooddddd to see her smileee once againnn [:

Waited with her at D' bustop for her bus.

Cramped and she had to skip a couple of busses .

HAHA.

Love her(:

I promise nothing like this will happen again.

I promise not to break your promise.

I promise never to leave you anymore.

You have my word. <3

WHY?!

Why don't anybody understands me.

Nobody knows how I feel.

Until I made known my motive, will then people realise how I feel.

Does that mean I can never give surprises?

Does that mean I can never talk to anyone about anything?

I'm in for deep shit now.

Good bye.

Wish me luck.

FUCK MY LIFE

Dumb day

today!

met drummer at JP.

She said she would be late

So, I stationed myself at the stairs that lead up to boon lay mrt!(take note of this red phrase)

While waiting,

The first lady - in her 50's? Approach me, asked me where is the nearest public phone.

I was like?? HELLO?!? 21st century over here??? Public phones?? I dont understand how these people live relying on public phones.

And after i said i not too sure, she was like.. :" you dont live near here do you?"

I was like :" erm yea??" I mean... isnt it obvious enough?!?!

The Second Guy - A more normaly saned guy. Just asked me where is the library.

Again.. i replied i did not know and he left with a smile. Not so much of weirdness.

The third lady - In her 30's. Apparently.. for people in her 30's, I'm sure they are not tat outdated as to not to owe a handphone, but people can realllly hit the limitsss sometimes.

She approach me... and asked :" Erm, excuse me, where is the MRT?"

LIKE WTSSSSS!?!?!? Cant you read the BOOONNN LAY MRT logo just like directly above my heaad?! I told u tok take note of the red phrase. I was just standing like less den 10 meters from de MRT station.

How dumb can people be.

Haix...

Pretty much cool day ahead.

Oh yea...

my first time taking the LRT.

scary bumpy ride.

I know i am abit sua gu.

But just SHUT UP.

This is something funny.

If cant see, den just click on it.

Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.

Megabites, without fail

Dined at megabites today!

WOOOO..

Soent quite a long time there.

Met up with drummer around 4pm.

Headed down to Megabites@ SIM.

Ordered chicken chop.

2 set.

Den, saw this new cheesefries.

Tempted to order.

In the end, we ordered it.

After tat.. saw a very delicious looking chocolate truffle cake.

and yeaps, we took it also.

HAHA.

And we ate alot.

Well... school's started, i guess is time for me to lose some fats.(:

She is always so pretty(:

And the truffle cake i was talking about.

It looked very delicious.

"Fudge: [:

And it is quite pricey.

In the midst of chaos, there is peace.

In the midst of war, there is victory

hot hot hot.

First day of school.

guess wad?

MEGA SUPER FREAKING ULTRA UBER TTM LATE.

zzzzz.

Monday is my IS.

Super nice class.

Got some nagging by Sharon and WMAN.

Is cool eh(:

we chose the same IS.

HAHA.

Found some familiar faces like SS.

HAHAHAHA.

Freggin funny guy.

Class is pretty small.

But very sociable and interactive bunch of people.

Really cool class.

Sad thing is.. three of us are not in the same group.

Stupid lecturer way of grouping people sucks.

And he dun allot slippers in his class.

Totally WTS.

OMG!

She is so hawt!!!!

Poetry

Seeing your smile,

It feels so good.

Wish I could stare at it till time ends,

Everything seemed impossible.

When hope runs low,

Faith kicks in.

Believe, trust and love,

Will make all obstacles tumble,

Will make all things clear,

And will once again,

Fill ourselves with hope.

Hope that is stronger than before.

Hope that will not shatter.

Hope that bonds us together.

No friend of foe would stand in our way.

Can we make it out of this maze?

Trust in each other will lead us to triumph.

Trust will let our love make known to others.

We will show others, we can do it.

Yes, we absolutely can.

This is not emo.

Is a poem.

I totally wrote it myself.

Proud.

Let the issue be The ISSUE!

Bloody Dinner TIME!

Met up with Ting Yan at Illuma!

HOHO!

Freaking empty I should say.

Just wanted to test out FilmGrade seats.

The seats are quite ok, except is quite hard.

And there is alot of room between your legs and the next row of seat in front of you.

Yeah but I dont really like it.

It makes cinemas lost their touch for cosyness and sense of closeness to your partners ( if you are going out with someone you loved ).

We watched "Accident"

Is dumb.

Very dumb.

The killing part is kinda smart and abit of a impossible also ( cept in the movies ).

Things got too precise.

Overall, boring.

Drummer was like complaining " I'm so gonna give this movie a one star".

Oh wells...

OK.

Had crazy bloody dinner at some random restaurant for dinner.

We decided to be daring and adventurous and ordered medium rare for our steak.

As both of us is quite full, we ordered one plate and shared.

The result of medium rare, a red, bloodied, raw, un-chewable, un-cuttable piece of steak.

The knife was almost futile against cutting that piece of steak.

And did I mention bout the chewing part?

We took a good five minutes just to chew it and eventually give up chewing and just swallow that darn piece followed by a gulp of water to ensure choke-free.

And the taste is well... ... raw!

Raw and red and blood and GROSS!

OK.

So gonna totally order well done next time.

If you take a look closer, you will see the disgusting blood.

And not to mention the rawness.

Just red down there.

A dope picture of my friend.

HAHA.

Very relaxed pose.

Credits : Ting Yan

Me

My handphone.

Bloody red meat[:

The more you hinder,

The more I irritate.

I don't give a damn.

I love you.

My life still goes on.

[:

qwerty

Must this really end like that?

Is there really no such thing as a happy ending?

Perhaps this is fate?

Perhaps we're just not strong enough?

Perhaps this is life.

Why are humans so selfish.

Why are humans so possessive.

Why are they always thinking about themselves first.

Why cant the be more open minded.

Why cant they just learn to let go.

Why do humans commit such atrocious crimes.

Why do humans not spare a thought for anyone else.

A lost of mutual respect and social trust.

You are now nothing but somebody i terribly looked down on.

N-O MORE GORE!

Sorority Row, definitely not my kind of movies.

For those who like gore and blood and bloodied bodies, this is the show for you.

Quite ridiculous at times, the way the killers kills certain people is abit of a uncanny.

And one very special trend I found out in most serial killers shows, the serial killer is always undefeated.

No matter how many time he kinda " died "

In situations in which a normal human being would have died, the serial killer can always survive it, and still run strong.

Kinda lame though.

You can stab him, shoot him, whack him, burn him, push him down the building, and he will end up running after you... running faster than the car.. taking a masssive huge weapon and still be going at high speeds.

HAHA... where got so strong one.

Damm bullshit.

Anyways... no more gory movie for me.

Sentosa in the noon was funalicious.

Very cooling weather.

A slight drizzle, very cold wind breezes and no SUN.

HAHA. nice weather..

Just sitting down at the shelter,

Spending very nice times with drummer.

I cant be any happier than this.

Just when every one was doing their stuffs, and there is only me and you.

And we just got really cool.

Be it talking, playing volleyball. Only me and you.

Life is bliss when I am with you.

HAHA.. ok.. here just to share one picture .

And i think this picture is very dope.

The wind was like blowing at me.. den my hair was like.. whisshh..

den is like.. wow.. so cooll.

HAHA

Credits : ME!

Rayban

Drummer!! with her amazing photo skills.

My phone with the amazing camera.

Photoscape with the black and white edit.

Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.

Trng

Boring.

Forced to stand on shoulders on 2 ultra unstable bench.

Forced to train one full routine.

Is sweating like a dog afterwards.

While carrying the bench out, one of it fell and it's leg fell directly onto my dumb.

Is still cursing and swearing till now.

@#$%

Mom went gym, didnt say a word.

Dad went company dinner, didnt say a word.

Grandparent never cook, didnt say a word.

Dad never go down for trng, never say a word!

Leave me alone till 8 before I realised is too late to do anything.

cant wait for tmr~

Curry Curry Curry

Met up with drummer ystd:D

Went to queensway!!!

HAHA!!

Is my bright idea to intro her some nice curry.

LOLS!

She said she had a thing for curry.

Yeaps.

After eating, just randomly walked around queensway.

OMG.

I realised there are alot of things i wanna buY!!

OK.

Headed to anchor point... Got her long sleeve shirt(:

Bought some earrings.

And down to Ikea.

Chocolatey, sweet tasting, forever-so-nice chocolate mousse:D

HAHA!!

Back home.

Life is good[:

Look at her ear-studs piercing through the paper-bag.

HAHA!

The camera was too bla bla.. i had to really tilt my entire body just to have me in the picture

and yes.. it was really a strain.

I like this alot:]

There!! what did I tell you.. looks really good.. and is even better den it looks:D

Grateful to me(:

Credits : Chocolate mousse

A sony digital camera.

Looks like is just me and you tonight.

Go with the flow... ...